Friday, July 11, 2014

Why are you so dressed up ?!?

This is my everyday look . I love lots of gold , hair done, red lips and false lashes
     "Why are you so dressed up?" I don't know how many times I have been asked that. I can remember the first time I mindfully chose my own clothes. I was in 4th grade. A pair of medium wash bell bottoms, a black  pleather jacket, and a plain white cotton t-shirt. My hair was brushed and just dangling above my hips . My little frizz poppers at the top of my head were slicked down with a light hairspray and I even had really cute black rubber sole loafers with a thick heel to match my oh so cool feeling pleather jacket. I remember feeling so beautiful because for once I wasn't in my typical 49er's sweatshirt, black double wide legged jinco jeans, fila shoes, green and white addidas jacket, topped off with a not so brushed low pony tale. For the first time I could remember I felt gorgeous. I thought everyone else would appreciate my effort as well. I remember waiting in anticipation for someone to comment on my outfit.

       I waited almost all morning. We were out at recess and I was playing by myself drawing on the ground with chalk when one of the "popular" girls decided to stroll over to comment on my efforts at looking nice. "Ew why are you so dressed up ? I bet you think you're cool now don't you!" It went on and on with mean cruel words. I tried to ignore it but tears started to blur my vision and I couldn't see what I was drawing. I couldn't find my words because even as a 9 year old I couldn't understand reasoning behind being that cruel to someone.
    That girl grew up and changed for the better, we even became friends in high school and she is a beautiful sweet soul now. But unfortunately that confidence crushing question still made it's way out of everyones mouth.

    I have slowly realized that no matter what you wear, do, say, write, or attempt in life there will always be a person to test your confidence in yourself. Someone who will intentionally say things to bring you down. With that I realized it's up to you  to continue to do what you enjoy. For some, confidence is truly a natural part of their being. But I am part of the most common crowd both men and women alike. I have struggled to feel good in what I do everyday. Even now I sometimes struggle. But isn't that life ?

    I still hate being criticized and looked at but I don't let it stop me from being fancy when I don't need to be. Little girls and boys everywhere in the world BE WHO YOU TRULY ARE!!!!! Don't let other's comments and rhetorical questions ruin your day or mood. Usually they are criticizing you for their own entertainment because they think what they say sounds good and will hurt you. And even if it does don't let them see it ! They don't deserve to see that personal side of you.

      I realize I am a crappy and scatter brain writer so to all those who are grammar freaks I apologize, not everyone is awesome at everything.

   Stay true to yourself and what the heck take a dang selfie!!!!

Here is a little pic of my daughter playing in my heels and posing because...SHE FEELS BEAUTIFUL!!!!